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  • Writer's pictureAshley Gray

Day 10 of comps... I just got approach by the long lost member of Full Force...


I've been MIA. I'm in the middle of comprehensive exams. As if taking classes and doing busy work isn't enough! Now I gotta do about 50 more pages to prove I know a thing or two. Anywho... It's Day 10 of comps. I still have my edges and most of my mind. My diet is trash and I wake up every day at 3:45am with new ideas to write. It's cruel and unusual and at the same time- a reminder that I'm on the other side of this PhD thing. I've been trying to protect my energy and keep the vibes good. I've been avoiding most things that bring me anxiety and I guess today was a reminder that my bubble of security has to be reconstructed often.


These days, I spend most of my life in coffeeshops with subpar java, emo playlists and nice-nasty baristas. Every now and then I have a weird coffeehouse experience and today is "every now and then" apparently. I just got approach by a long lost member of the group Full Force. His hair... I won't call it a Jheri curl, but it was real j curl-ish. His haircut from the past and synthetic fashion nova dress material undershirt in jungle print met me long before his words introduced him. Had the nerve to pair those with an oversized blazer... He looked like one of those baby boy frat pictures where the little Black boy is standing in a man's suit in front of a mirror throwing up the fraternity sign. I'm certain that photo series is supposed to convey something very deep and meaningful about becoming a man and since I've never been one it's an oversized suit that I see.


So here's the interaction...


Him: Do you do PR work?

Me: No

Him: Well what do you do?

Me: I work and I'm in school full-time

Him: So you don't do any PR?

Me: Nope. (Because my answer didn't magically change)

Him: You must be at Howard

Me: You know. *looks back at laptop* At this point I'm wondering if he's one of those sugar daddies from that WUSA9 news article. I mean, a haircut is just around the corner and this tuition ain't gonna pay... but the synthetic jungle print just won't do. More loans for me.

Him: So do you have a card?

Me: No, but I'll take yours. (I'm trying to be nice because I legit think ppl are crazy. Sad choice. I get it.

Him: Well text me and I'll have your number.

Me: Yeah after my phone charges.


Let's discuss the card

This card says he's a singer and inspirational speaker. I would give y'all the website, but it didn't work. His single is "gotta change". That's something we have in common. I GOTTA CHANGE whatever vibe is giving him the impression that we'd be a good match. I'm not going to post an actual picture of him (also on his card), but I will let you know he looks like a member of Full Force. The curl is cut to an obtuse angle and he smells like cool water. Now don't get me wrong... curve (men) still smells like bad decisions and future custody battles- I'm not hating. But a little less of it. The management company is called T.O.U.C.H.E.D. (Transforming our universe with Christ's help until everyone's delivered).


Now I feel bad, what if he was offering me Christ? Well, it sure didn't feel like it. And TOUCHED? Bruh, TOUCHED?!? In this generation of addressing unwanted touch I would think that name would pivot. Just my thoughts.


This is further proof that y'all have not been praying for me like you said you would.


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